During our time in Maine, I attended a couple of schools. For the first time, I ate peanut butter and marshmellow creme sandwiches (a northeastern thing?). It felt like we were breaking the rules. I would eat it quickly as if it would turn into bologna and cheddar any second. In art class, we were given … Continue reading My 1st short story
I went to Sunrise Valley for one week in 1990. Some might remember me- a girl who abruptly showed up on a Monday and disappeared on a Friday. I was probably dressed in TJMax clothes to replace my hand-me-downs which were either left behind or worn too thin. Clothes that I had worn exploring the woods, watching … Continue reading Strange Valentine
I was young when I was exposed to inappropriate adult content. We briefly lived with my father’s friend before we took off to Maine. Apparently, she had babysat us for years and we had developed a deep bond which I cannot recall experiencing. I found a copy of her letter amongst my father's documents: … have … Continue reading PG is optional
Reading my father's account of what happened was incredibly bizarre. I have held onto, yet never read his account for almost 15 years. What the hell. Still as a statue, with a slow, hard heartbeat and a deeply flushed face, I read: On school nights, we studied and played. (Melissa is an honor student) or … Continue reading The Arrest
When I was 9 years old, my mother decided to come back into our lives. I am still unsure of why but I know that it completely changed the trajectory of my life. It was not a simple situation of joint custody and sharing holidays- it was a nightmare and I wonder every day how I survived. … Continue reading So, I was kidnapped
A few more memories broke free from the dark corners of my mind. They are memories that I remember, remembering. For some reason, I had packed them tightly away during my last brainstorming session. I think I also get confused as to when things happen but as I am laying the timeline out several things … Continue reading Oh hey, a few more memories
I made this sometime between 1985 - 1989, before I knew how to spell "poem" correctly. Below is a selection of some of my favorites, including a poem I apparently wrote. Again- no memory of this but it is clear that I loved poetry and writing from an early age.
In no particular order, here was my life in Ohio from ages 4- 9 years old. I only remember life at the homestead and with my family. I do not remember going to school or having friends. The exception being a girl scouts trip. I have a memory of a cabin and one of those … Continue reading It went something like this
It has been over a month since my last entry. I reached out to both of my parents and then I needed time to recoup. In a wine-inspired act of courage, I felt a misguided sense of hope that I could share with them that I understood and forgave them (and to somehow escape unscathed). I suppose that … Continue reading First memories
I wake up at 3 am, as I often do. The hours between 3-5 am are the moments where my mind chooses to rouse me from a series of rich, lucid dreams. To reach deep into my memories and carefully lay out the thoughts and images that I usually cannot hold still in the presence of daylight. These are … Continue reading Interlude
Melfuntioning Memories 